


owo is the meaning of life

by peko_yamas



Category: Dangan Ronpa - All Media Types, New Dangan Ronpa V3: Everyone's New Semester of Killing
Genre: F/F, F/M, M/M, a lot of this is based of irl conversations, chatfic, idk what im doing, its ouma not oma smh, this fic used to have kaimaki but i dont ship kaimaki anymore so uhh i edited out the fic
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-04-03
Updated: 2018-07-27
Packaged: 2019-04-17 20:32:04
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 7,395
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/14197170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/peko_yamas/pseuds/peko_yamas
Summary: Suuichi doesn’t remember when he was added to the group chat, but it was probably a week or two after he had moved to the school. All he knew, is that every single time he went into the chat, he regretted it almost immediately.





	1. In which Gonta is a slut and Kokichi is a cuck

**Author's Note:**

> Because i'm from Scotland and Scottish and I don't know anything about Japanese or American schools I just decided to use the Scottish schooling systems so if anything seems weird that's probably it.
> 
> Their ultimates are just things they’re all really interested in/spend a lot of times doing/ really good at/things they want to do when their older.
> 
> Im sowwy Margaret 
> 
> (not really)
> 
> The main ships are kokichi/shuuichi, maki/kaito, tenko/himiko, kaede/kirumi and idk maybe one or two more
> 
> if anyone wonders why kokichi, kaede and tsumugi have a group chat together it’s bc once had to work on a group project together but they ended up keeping the gc 
> 
> Shuuichi: shoewy-chewy  
> Kaede: painst  
> Kaito: kaithoe  
> Kokichi: pantaslut  
> Kiibo: Kiiboy  
> Miu: Japantsu  
> Gonta: bugs life  
> Maki: Makiroll  
> Korekiyo: Korekiyo  
> Angie: god is real and he sucked my dick  
> Tenko: Les-BIEN  
> Himiko: Harry potter rip-off  
> Rantaro: guacamole  
> Kirumi: kirumi  
> Ryoma: I believe  
> Tsumugi: sowwy mr obwama

 

 

 

 

Shuuichi doesn’t remember when he was added to the group chat, but it was probably a week or two after he had moved to the school. All he knew, is that every single time he went into the chat, he regretted it almost immediately.

 

**OWO is the meaning of life**

 

_1: 55_

 

pantaslut: gonta is a slut!!

 

Painst: NO!! NO HE IS NOT!!

 

Bugs life: Gonta isn’t quite sure what kokichi is talking about.

 

Bugs life: What is a slut?

 

pantaslut: If ur a slut for something it means u really like it like how im a slut for panta

 

painst: kokicHI I SWEAR TO GOD

 

god is real and sucked my dick: atua*

 

Bugs life: oh! Gonta think he understands!

 

Shoey-chewy: ?????

 

Bugs life: Gonta is a slut for bugs!

 

Japantsu: OH MY GOD HAHAHAHA

 

painst: kokichi

 

pantaslut: owo yes

 

painst: for fucks sake why are you like this

 

painst: Gonta, like usual, kokichi is lying.

 

pantaslut: >:O MUUUM!!! KAEDE SAID A BAD WORD

 

Shoey-chewy: What did I walk into to.

 

Bugs life: kokichi is lying? Gonta is confused, then what is a slut?

 

Japantsu: WELL SINCE YOU ASKED

 

Kirumi: Miu, Don’t you dare even think about finishing that sentence.

 

pantaslut: shuuichi~!!

 

Japantsu: :(

 

Shoey-chewy: It’s 2am in the morning

 

Shoey-chewy: My phone hasn’t stopped buzzing for five minuets

 

Shoey-chewy: And it’s all because you are all discussing whither or not Gonta is a slut

 

Bugs life: Gonta is more confused now D:

 

painst: please dont worry about it Gonta

 

Bugs life: If Kaede tells Gonta not to worry about it then Gonta wont!! :D

 

pantaslut: I still stand by my statement~ gonta is a slut!!

 

Shoey-chewy: Why are you all like this

 

pantaslut: u kno u can just use y’all

 

Shoey-chewy: No

 

Kirumi: Please, all of you just go to sleep. I’m getting a headache from all the buzzing.

 

Bugs life: Gonta is going to go to bed now!! Goodnight everyone!! :D

 

painst: Goodnight Gonta!! Don’t let the bed bugs bite!!

 

Bugs life: There are bugs in Gonta’s bed??

 

pantaslut: nighty-night~

 

Bugs life: :DD

 

painst: no theres not, I least I don’t think so, it’s just a figure of speach

 

Bugs life: D:

 

_*Bugs life has went offline*_

 

Painst: shuuichi, why is your nickname Shoey-chewy of all things??

 

Shoey-chewy: Miu called me that once and Kokichi nearly choked to death because he was laughing so hard.

 

painst: oohhh that makes a lot of sense

 

painst: well! I’m going to beg now!! Goodnight!!

 

pantaslut: never took you to be the person to be into begging kinkaede

 

painst: BEG*

 

painst: BED***

 

painst: FUCK

 

kaithoe: oh my godfrndcvnjff

 

sowwy mr obwama: im crying

 

Japantsu: KINKAEDE

 

Japantsu: HAHAHAHAHAHA

 

paintst: kokichi

 

_*Japantsu changed painst’s nickname to kinkaede*_

 

kinkaede: MIU

 

kinkaede: MIU ARE YOU MOANING

 

Japantsu: MMMMM

 

kinkaede: im done with all of you

 

kinkaede: goodnight to everyone except kokichi and miu

 

Shoey-chewy: Why didn’t I transfer to a different class

 

_*kinkaede has gone offline*_

 

pantaslut: :(( Shuuichi

 

_*Shoey-chewy has gone offline*_

 

Kirumi: Please, go to sleep.

 

_*Kirumi has gone offline*_

 

god is real and he sucked my dick: Bye-onara!!

 

_*god is real and he sucked my dick has gone offline*_

 

pantaslut: :(( I feel so alone

 

Japantsu: IM STILL HERE YOU GRAPE TWINK

 

pantaslut: why does the only person online have to be such a disgusting pig

 

Japantsu: HEY

 

_*pantaslut has went offline*_

 

Japantsu: THAT FUCIGND

 

Japantsu: >:/

 

_Japantsu has changed Kirumi’s nickname to milf_

 

_*Japantsu has went offline*_

 

* * *

 

 

_4:47am_

_  
kaithoe, I believe and Sowwy mr obwama are online._

 

kaithoe: okay okay okay

 

kaithoe: so you know kiibo’s weird sticky up-y hair thing

 

kaithoe: and you know the movie pinnochio or however its spelt

 

sowwy mr obwama: pinocchio*

 

kaithoe: imagine whenever he lied it would grow

 

kaithoe: “hey kiibo did you steal my spare charger”

 

kaithoe: “no”

 

kaithoe: and it just goes WHOOSH

 

sowwy mr obwama: oh my god

 

I believe: and stabs me to death ending my fucking life

 

kaithoe: ryoma what the fuck

 

sowwy mr obwama: relatable

 

I believe: but wouldn’t something like that be better for kokichi

 

kaithoe: I mean yeah but he’s constantly lying after an hour whatever grew would be bigger that miu’s sextoy collection, and that’s fuckign gianourmous

 

sowwy mr obwana: gianourmous

 

kaithoe: shut your fuck

 

sowwy mr obwama: 3:

 

I believe: you have a point

 

kaithoe: ok so back to the whole kiinochio thing

 

sowwy mr obwama: you know you just implied that you know how big miu’s sex toy collection is, also implying she had either told you or you’ve seen it ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

I believe: kiinochio?

 

kaithoe: LET ME FINISH

 

kaithoe: TSUNAMI NO

 

kaithoe: what the fuck autocorrect

 

sowwy mr obwama: tsunami

 

kaithoe: can you please just shut up and let me f i n i s h

 

kaithoe: ryoma I see you typing shut the fuck up or I will force to you to practice self care

 

kaithoe: since kiibo’s always going on about how hes just as human as the rest of us, I just imagine him saying “i wanna be a real boy”

 

sowwy mr obwama: NVLKJFDG N I CAN SEE IT

 

kaithoe: so basically pinnochio except kiibo’s creator is the grandfather, he’s pinnochio and the fairy thing is tsumugi and idk who’ll be the cricket dude

 

sowwy mr obwama: I approve, miu can be the donkey bc shes an ass

 

I believe: flawless logic

 

I believe: but have you even seen the movie?

 

kaithoe: no

 

I believe: that explains a lot

 

kaithoe: ok im going back to sleep

 

I believe: have fun with that

 

_*kaithoe has gone offline*_

 

_*I believe has gone offline*_

 

_*sowwy mr obwama has gone offline*_

 

* * *

 

 

_8:12am_

 

_guacamole, Shoey-chewy, pantaslut and 5 others are online._

 

guacamole: So uh

 

guacamole: what the fuck

 

Shoey-chewy: I honestly have no idea

 

Shoey-chewy: Why does this have to be what I wake up to

 

Shoey-chewy: I should be more concerned, about how normal these types of things have become and at the state of everyone’s mental health

 

guacamole: relatable

 

kinkaede: im not even going to ask

 

Milf: Why is this my nickname now.

 

Milf: Which one of you horrible children did this.

 

god is real and he sucked my dick: OH MY ATUA

 

guacamole: SDJFVFSSJNVNAJSNNJDSA

 

kinkaede: I-

 

Shoey-chewy: You don’t even need to be a detective to figure that one out

 

sowwy mr obwama: FJDSDVNFDJ OWO WHATS THIS

 

pantaslut: OWO

 

Milf: Everyone one of you are terrible.

 

Milf: I spend all my spare time providing you with the best I can.

 

Milf: I wash your clothes, I feed you and clean your rooms.

 

Milf: I deal with Miu’s… “accidents”, I put up with everyone’s bullshit.

 

Milfs: And this is the thanks I get.

 

Milf: Do any of you have respect for your mother?

 

Milf: I’m guessing not.

 

Milf: Class starts in 13 minuets. Please make sure you are all ready and in class by then because I am not covering for any of you this time due to this incident.

 

_*Milf has gone offline*_

 

pantaslut: good job everyone ://// you scared mtoehr away

 

kaithoe: mthoehr

 

guacamole: mthoehr

 

japantu: mthoehr

 

sowwy mr obwama: mthoehr

 

kinkaede: mthoehr

 

Shoey-chewy: mthoehr

 

*Makiroll changed Milf’s nickname to mthoehr*

 

panta: WAAAAAAAAAHH YOU’RE ALL SO MEAN

 

kaithoe: MAKI-

 

_*Makiroll has went offline*_

 

god is real and he sucked my dick: maki doing atua’s work

 

guacamole: ^^^^^^

 

Shoey-chewy: I’m in the E wing the now. Where are all of you. Reg starts in five minuets.

 

God is real and he sucked my dick: Angie is currently speaking to our art teacher~

 

kinkaede: I’m handing in homework

 

sowwy mr obwama: i’m dying

 

kinkaede: understandable have a nice day

 

kaithoe: Im uhhhh still in bed

 

Shoey-chewy: Kiato!! I swear to god!!

 

pantaslut: I’m currently being murdered~

 

guacamole: How?

 

pantaslut: by the crushing weight of my responsibilities and the stress of life itself

 

Shoey-chewy: what

 

I believe: relatable

 

pantaslut: That’s a lie! i’m being crushed by a hydraulic press

 

kaithoe: an kokichi pancake

 

pantaslut: no

 

Shoey-chewy: No.

 

_*Shoey-chewy has gone offline*_

 

* * *

 

 

_12:26pm_

 

_sowwy mr obwama, pantaslut and Shoey-chewy are online._

 

sowwy mr obwama: i’m disowning you. Why are you like this.

 

pantaslut: it’s a valid question uke

 

sowwy mr obwama: & and it would be the egg just saying

 

pantaslut: FUCK

 

pantalut: OH MY GODCATKGSTKVSTJVSUKGSYYY

 

pantaslut: owo

 

sowwy mr obwama: I wanna make a seme joke now

 

pantaslut: also r u gonna be in school tmmo

 

pantaslut: I need my furry buddy no one else understands the power of owo

 

sowwy mr obwama: yeaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah I want to die

 

pantaslut: you know it;s just not the _seme_ without you :33

 

sowwy mr obwama: DJFKJDKVJGDBJNBJKBFJB OH MY GODHJD

 

sowwy mr obwama: yaoi jokes? In my 2018? more likely than you think

 

Shoey-chewy: what the fucked

 

pantaslut: what the fucked

 

sowwy mr obwama: what the fucked

 

pantaslut: what the fucked

 

sowwy mr obwama: what the fucked

 

pantaslut: what the fucked

 

sowwy mr obwama: what the fucked

 

Shoey-chewy: :(((

 

_sowwy mr obwama has changed Shoey-chewy’s nickname to what the fucked_

 

sowwy mr obwama: ;)

 

What the fucked: You know

 

What the fucked: Just for that

 

What the fucked: *takes a deep breath*

 

pantaslut: boiii

 

What the fucked: tsumugi read a piss fic and tried to get me to read it too

 

pantaslut: WJOKJENFJGNJ

 

Japantsu: HAHAHAHAHAHA

 

pantaslut: :/// the sluts back again

 

sowwy mr obwama: shuuichi

 

sowwy mr obwama: CUCK YOU

 

What the fucked: I DONT WANT TO READ A FUCKIGN PISS FIC YOU KINKY FUCK

 

kinkaede: IM FUCKIPISSINGHG

 

pantaslut: like tsumugi? :3

 

kinkaede: kokichi

 

what the fucked: KEEP YOU ANF YOUR PISS KINK TO YOURSELF

 

sowwy mr obwama: AND I DONT BLAME YOU

 

sowwy mr obwama: FUCK YOU KOKICHI I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL

 

sowwy mr obwama: u kno what

 

sowwy mr obwama: im going to hunt that fic down

 

kinkaede: please don’t

 

pantaslut: im looking for fluff not feces :///

 

pantaslut: #fluffbeforefeces

 

what the fucked: you know im just realizing more than half the class has either never talked in the chat or barely uses it

 

kinkaede: honestly I dont blame them but I am a little dissapointed

 

kinkaede: I know himiko can’t be bothered to use her phone because charging it requires to much effort and tenko broke her phone because he dropped it when she was kicking teruteru in the face

 

sowwy mr obwama: and Im going to send you all the link

 

pantaslut: why did that take you so long to type

 

kinkaede: has anyone ever seen korekiyo use his phone?

 

kinkaede: I don’t think Kiiboy has a phone, being a robot and all. Miu is constantly getting it taken away or in detention for texting in class and being well… Miu

 

_pantaslut has changed sowwy mr obwama’s nickname to piss kink_

 

kaithoe: korekiyo is more of a cryptid than ryoma

 

I believe: should I be taking offense to that?

 

kinkaede: probably not

 

pantaslut: has anyone seen gonta today

 

Mthoer: No. What are you planning.

 

Mthoer: also thank you to whoever changed my nickname. It’s still terrible but at least it’s an improvement to…. “milf”

 

pantaslut: I got him a gift!~

 

What the fucked: Im scared

 

Bugs life: You got Gonta a gift? :D

 

pantaslut: nishishishi I did

 

kinkaede: why did you feel the need to type out your laugh

 

piss kink: ://////////////////////////////////////

 

piss kink: I hate this nickname so mcuh

 

kaithoe: I mean… it suits you

 

Makiroll: what the fuck

 

piss kink: maki can you kill kaito for me

 

maki roll: sure 

 

kaithoe: D: 

 

* * *

 

 

What the fucked: where are you guys? aren’t we meant to meet up for lunch?? so far only Rantaro, kokichi and Kiibo have shown up

 

What the fucked: everyone who doesn’t have clubs*

 

guacamole: what are you even corectng

 

pantaslut: corectng

 

Bugs life: Gonta is sorry! He was talking to his teacher

 

piss kink: im off dying of both sickness and betrayal

 

piss kink: and because certain someone *cough* shithara *cough* decided to open his mouth, I decided to expose him as well

 

kinkaede: shithara-

 

pantaslut: wow thats a bad cough you should really get it checked out

 

what the fucked: tsumugi what are you doing

 

guacamole: not to sound like kokichi but owo whats this

 

kiboy: ???

 

Japantsu: MMMMMM OOO IS SHYHARA SECRETLY A KINKY BITCH

 

piss kink: not quite, close, but not quite

 

what the fucked: TSUMUGI

 

kinkaede: im so confused right now

 

piss kink: well, the other week I dragged shuuichi and kokichi into cosplaying

 

guacamole: of course it had something to do with cosplaying

 

kinkaede: but why them?

 

piss kink: they where hanging out together and shuuichi promised to cosplay with me since he was ditching me :///

 

what the fucked: was guilt tripped me and forced me to go otherwise she was going to steal my hat*

 

kaithoe: shuuichi ditched you? Not cool man

 

kinkaede; you and shuuichi hang out??

 

guacamole: oh yeah you never told us why you didn’t show up last week

 

piss kink: ok so theres a detective show a few of us all like and one time I broke my laptop so I went over to shuuichi’s to watch it and it became a weekly thing, and eventually everyone else started coming as well

 

god is real and he sucked my dick: the show is simply divine~ both angie and atua love the show

 

kinkaede: everyone else?

 

piss kink: kokichi, rantaro, angie, kirumi, ryoma and korekiyo.

 

Pisskink: we’re getting off track im trying to expose him okay!!

 

guacamole: does anyone know the time?

 

piss kink: rantaro I swear to god

 

god is real and he sucked my dick: atua*

 

Japantsu: WILL ALL OF YOU DICKWADS SHUT UP I WANNA KNOW ABOUT SHYHARA’S KINK

 

pantaslut: nishishi something you’re hiding from up my beloved shuuichi-chan~

 

piss kink: ok so during our cosplay session kokichi was cosplay jiro and shuuichi was cosplaying haruki.

 

guacamole: oooooooo

 

piss kink: and practically the entire time shuuichi stared at kokichi’s ass, he was trying to be subtle about it but honestly whenever kokichi wasn’t looking shuuichi was checking him out.

 

piss kink: I mean I don't blame him kokichi looked rlly fcking good he was wearing tight ass jeans

 

guacamole: FNKJKDJGNFJBGDDNJBMF HOLY SHIT SHUUICHI

 

piss kink: he’s rlly thirsty for kokichi

 

piss kink: he spends a good 1/3 of his time complaning about him and how mcuh hes wants to smooch him

 

Japantsu: HAHAHAHHAHAHA OH MY GOD

 

kaithoe: gbjnfbndngjnfFVKJGNJFSNDJFN

 

kinkaede: oh my god

 

what the fucked: TSUMUGI I AM GOING TO S N A P Y O U R F U C K I N G N E C K

 

Makiroll: i’d pay too see that

 

bugs life: NO!! Do not snap Tsumugi’s neck DD:

 

Korekiyo: What?

 

piss kink: are you even strong enough to snap my neck

 

kaithoe: no offense bro but yeah he’s not

 

guacamole: korkboard!

 

piss kink: vorekiyo!!

 

Korekiyo: why

 

kinkaede: korekiyo finally comes online and this is what he is welcomed with

 

kinkaede: korekiyo you came at a bad time

 

guacamole: shuuichi OH MY GOD

 

_what the fucked has left the chat_

 

guacamole: he just stood up and walked out the library, he blushing a fuck ton but he looks really pissed off

 

guacamole: no offense mugi but you probably shouldn’t of said that

 

kaithoe: KORKBOARD

 

kaithoe: VOREKIYO

 

guacamole: and kokichi is just sitting there blushing hes not even responding I think we broke him

 

guacamole: this is the quietest ive ever seen him be

 

_kaithoe has changed Korekiyo’s nickname to vorekiyo_

 

vorekiyo: And suddenly I am reminded why I never wanted to use this hell chat in the first place. It is good to study human interaction. Not good if you want to keep any shreds of sanity you have left intact.

 

Makiroll: mood

 

guacamole: _sent an image_

 

kinkaede: no offense but that is kinda adorable

 

kaithoe: why would that be offensive????

 

kinkaede: shrug

 

vorekiyo: I’m terribly confused right now.

 

guacamole: update: kokichi has stood up and has left the library

 

kaithoe: is he going after shuuichi??

 

guacamole: probably

 

piss kink: the one day im off school sick and this happens :(

 

kinkaede: is this a good thing or a bad thing??

 

Japantsu: look likes shuuichi’s gonna get some ASS

 

Mthoer: Miu, please don’t phrase it like that.

 

Mthoer: Regardless of the.. circumstances, I am glad that it is likely they are going to discus their feelings for each other.

 

kaithoe: They have feelings for each other???

 

guacamole: no offense dude but how have you not noticed by now

 

Makiroll: it’s painfully obvious idiot

 

kinkaede: it’s even more obvious than maki’s pining for you

 

Makiroll: Do you want to die.

 

I believe: yes

 

kinkaede: NO THANK YOU

 

bugs life: Please don’t kill kaede D:

 

Japantsu: ten bucks their making out

 

_kinkaede added Shuuichi Saihara to the chat_

 

_Shuuichi Saihara has left the chat_

 

kaithoe: your on

 

mthoer: please don’t bet on our friend’s love life

 

I believe: You say that as if you didn’t make a bet with me over Maki’s and Kaito’s.

 

Mthoer: Ryoma.

 

I believe: yes?

 

piss kink: owo whats this

 

Mthoer: You are dead to me.

 

guacamole: DFJBVNJVCN N

 

kinkaede: oh my god

 

* * *

 

1:34pm.

 

_Les-BIEN, guacamole, kinkaede and three others are online,_

 

kinkaede: Has anyone seen Shuu???

 

kinkaede: He’s not in math and I’m kinda worried

 

Les-BIEN: What did that degenerate do now?

 

kinkaede: he didn’t do anything.

 

guacamole: oh shit its tenko

 

Les-BIEN: oh shit its a MENace

 

Japantsu: HE PROBABLY GETTING SOME OF THAT KOKICHI ASS

 

kinkaede: Miu please stop

 

kinkaede: This is serious.

 

Mthoer: Have you tried messaging him?

 

kinkaede: I’ve messaged him a few times but he’s not replying. Maki, Kaito and Tsmugi’s messaged him.

 

Mthoer: I can try messaging him too if you’d like.

 

Mthoer: There is a chance he’s with Kokichi at the moment, so maybe try texting him?

 

kinkaede: that’s a really good idea, I’ll try doing that.

 

* * *

 

 

_1:38pm_

 

_Private chat between kinkaede and pantaslut_

 

kinkaede: Kokichi?

 

pantaslut: yeah?

 

pantaslut: I’m guessing you’re gonna ask about Shuichi

 

pantaslut: He’s fine, dw.

 

kinkaede: I’m glad.

 

kinkaede: Can you ask him to text me back if he’s feeling up to it.

 

pantaslut: ok

 

* * *

 

 

**Don't fuck the piano**

_1:32pm_

 

piano fuckers anonymous: Shuu??

 

_1:34pm_

 

piano fuckers anonymous: Shuuuuu???

 

_1:36pm_

 

piano fuckers anonymous: I’m getting really worried

 

piano fuckers anonymous: Hey shuu you okay?

 

piano fuckers anonymous: everyone’s getting kinda worried in the group chat

 

piano fuckers anonymous: and you haven’t shown up for class and that’s really not like you

 

hot topic employee: Sorry

 

piano fuckers anonymous: There’s no need to apologize shuu

 

hot topic employee: I’m just a little annoyed at Tsumugi right now.

 

hot topic employee: She knew about my crush on kokichi and I’m just kinda upset that she would just tell it the group chat, and I don’t think I’m able to face her the now.

 

hot topic employee: I’m probably over-reacting like usual but she _promised_

 

hot topic employee: I proabably am, sorry, I’ve just had a really rough week.

 

piano fuckers anonymous: Yeah it was kinda a dick move

 

piano fuckers anonymous: I think she feels really bad, she looks really guilty and keeps glancing back at your chair, and she’s texted you a few times.

 

piano fuckers anonymous: also don’t worry about getting in trouble for skipping, I told the teacher you were feeling really sick so you went to the office, so if you need some more time to yourself then you’ve got the rest of the period.

 

hot topic employee: Thank you Kaede

 

piano fuckers anonymous: You’re welcome shuu <3

 

piano fuckers anonymous: Also what do you mean by rough week? Everything okay?

 

hot topic employee: <3

 

hot topic employee: My parent’s are back for two weeks and they’re just both being really stressful, they keep pointing out every little thing I do wrong and just don't know when enough is enough. They’re constantly getting angry at me and it just seems like the smallest of things are making me really upset.

 

piano fuckers anonymous: Ah, if you need somewhere to get away from them for a bit then I can talk to the others about hanging out more after school or sleepovers or something?

 

piano fuckers anonymous: Also do you know where kokichi is?

 

hot topic employee: Honestly? I really like that.

 

hot topic employee: Yeah, we’re together the now.

 

hot topic employee: He came looking for me when I didn’t show up for last class, we’re in our english classroom, the teacher was okay with us borrowing it for a while until I calmed down.

 

piano fuckers anonymous: Oh you’re together? ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

hot topic employee: Kayday don't do this

 

piano fuckers anonymous: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

piano fuckers anonymous: no but serious are you both cool?

 

hot topic employee: Yeah.

 

kinkaede: anything happened ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

hot topic employee: Nah

 

hot topic employee: We’ve not really gotten around to talking about it?

 

hot topic employee: We ended up talking about my parents and other stuff, like classes or shows or something.

 

kinkaede: ohh ok

 

kinkaede: are you going to bring it up?

 

hot topic employee: idk

 

hot topic employee: probably, I really want to but im just kinda nervous

 

kinkaede: I think you should

 

hot topic employee: hnng

 

hot topic employee: ok i’ll ask him when he gets back, he went to go get something for us to eat.

 

kinkaede: ok!! i’m glad for you shuu

 

_1:40pm_

 

hot topic employee: ok so he’s back

 

kinkaede: askhimoutaskhimout

 

kinkaede: go get that ass

 

hot topic employee: you’ve been spending to much time around miu no offense

 

hot topic employee: waigt I jus tufcigg thougth fo somehting

 

kinkaede: dude are you okay

 

hot topic employee: yesss dim fine im just sturggling to type becuas eim laughigng so hard

 

hot topic employee: please ass me back to the mian chta this ijs exptremly imorttant

 

kinkaede: ass

 

kinkaede: also stop fuckign stalling and get yoursself a bf already jeeez

 

hot topic employee: no

 

hot topic employee: I will!! this is just extremely important

 

* * *

 

 

**OWO is the meaning of life**

 

1:49pm

 

_kinkaede, Gucamole, piss kink, and four others are online._

 

_kinkaede has added Shuuichi shuuichi to the chat._

 

_Shuuichi Saihara has changed Gucamole’s nickname to rantarotoast_

 

Shuuichi Saihara: :)

 

rantarotoast: but why

 

Shuuichi Saihara: your hair looks like an avacado, and we were eating toast and it popped into my head

 

rantarotoast: we?

 

Shuuichi Saihara: me and kokichi

 

Rantarotoast: why are you eating toast?

 

Shuuichi Saihara: I haven’t ate anything all day

 

Rantarotoast: but why toast??

 

Shuuichi Saihara: The staff base had a toaster

 

Rantarotoast: ooooh

 

kinkaede: ( ͡° ͜ʖ ͡°)

 

Shuuichi Saihara: kayday, stop.

 

Rantarotoast: kayday?

 

Shuuichi Saihara: kayday.

 

piss kink: fault in our stars 2018

 

kinkaede: no

 

pantaslut: do u think kiiboy is good at doing the robot

 

Kiiboy: THAT’S ROBOPHOBIC

 

Shuuichi Saihara: is this the day of people actually using their phones

 

pantaslut: shuichiiiiii your name is so boring :((((

 

Shuuichi Saihara: then change it

 

_pantaslut has changed Shuuichi Saihara’s nickname to sucks toes_

 

_sucks toes has changed sucks toes nickname to my chemical bromance_

 

pantaslut: that is so unoriginal

 

pantaslut: I hate it

 

kaithoe: you fuckin emo

 

kinkaede: I trusted you shuu L((

 

_my chemical bromance has changed pantaslut’s nickname to cuckichi_

 

Les-BIEN: L((

 

my chemical bromance: :)

 

my chemical bromance: HE FUKICNB GKICKED M EO OWW

 

my chemical: :(((

 

rantarotoast: karma

 

my chemical bromance: wow

 

Les-BIEN: that’s what you get for being a degenerate male!

 

Mthoer: why is everyone using their phone in class?

 

cuckichi: aren’t you using your phone tho….

 

Mthoer: …

 

cuckichi: *shuuichi voice* busted

 

kinkaede: what??

 

My chemical bromance: w h a t ? ?

 

My chemical bromance: why my voice

 

cuckichi: you’re a detective duhhh

 

My chemical bromance: but im not a detective?? I mean I’ve worked on a few cases with my uncle

 

kinkaede: sounds very detective-y to me

 

rantarotoast: swuichi wultimate dewetive

 

kaithoe: you’ve been spending too much time around tsumugi and kokichi

 

My chemical bromance: wantarwo wultimate dwisowned

 

cuckichi: JDFNVJDNDF

 

* * *

 

**Don't fuck the piano**

 

hot topic employee: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAHHHH

 

piano fuckers anonymous: ???

 

piano fuckers anonymous: OHHHH MY GOOOD

 

piano fuckers anonymous: IS THIS WHAT I THINK IT IS

 

hot topic employee: YES

 

hot topic employee: IM GOING TO GO FUCKIGN D I E

 

piano fuckers anonymous: NO DONT YOU HAVE SOMEONE TO LIVE FOR

 

hot topic employee: MY HEART IS RACING SO FAST?? I THINK IM GOING TO PASS OUT

 

piano fuckers anonymous: UNLIKE ME

 

hot topic employee: you do realise you have to actully talk to girls to get a girlfriend

 

piano fuckers anonymous: suddenly I can’t read

 

hot topic employee: goddamit kaeday

 

* * *

 

**The three P’s**

 

_6:32pm_

 

kaibosh clowns: shuu fell asleep during the movie I feel so betrayed

 

kaibosh clowns: lookatthisasshole.jpg

 

paino sharde nya: thats so adorable wtf

 

paino sharde nya: ofc u have a checkmark blanket

 

watches hentai for the plot: he looks so happy

 

watches hentai for the plot: the only emotion ive ever seen from him is tired, sad or fed up with everyone

 

paino sharde nya: I think this is the only time ive seen him sleep

 

paino sharde nya: did you knock him out or smth

 

watches hentai for the plot: furry

 

kaibosh clowns: owo yes?

 

watches hentai for the plot: when are you going to tell everyone elseeee

 

kaibosh clowns: when shuu is awake

 

paino sharde nya: ok good idea

 

* * *

 

 

**OWO is the meaning of life**

_6: 53pm_

 

Japantsu: do you know that gundham kid?

 

piss kink: yes I know that gundham kid

 

cuckichi: that lives in the animal shed?

 

piss kink: oh yes I know that gundham kid

 

Japantsu: that shoves hamsters up his ass all day!!

 

rantarotoast: W H A T

 

my chemical bromance: THIS IS NOT WHAT I EXPECTED

 

kinkaede: it’s miu shuu, of course this was going to happen

 

my chemical bromance: oh shit ur right

 

piss kink: ever since shuichi gained kokichi smooching rights he’s started typing a lot more like him

 

piss kink: he’s a bad influence

 

my chemical bromance: _kokichi smooching rights-_

 

rantarotoast: KOKICHI SMOOCHING RIGHTS???????? HWAT

 

Japantsu: do you think if you shoved a hamster up your ass it’d be picked up in an x-ray

 

mthoer: yes, it would. Hamsters contain a skeleton, and that skeleton would be shown in the x-ray. Miu you are the ultimate inventor, you should know this by now.

 

Rantarotoast: is no one going to talk about kokichi smooching rights????????

 

Japantsu: :((

 

rantarotoast: actual quote from gundham “who needs fingers when you have the four dark devas of destruction”

 

piss kink: OH Y GGODD

 

Les-BIEN: as expected from a degenerate!! disgusting!!

 

cuckichi: shut ur mouth karate kid

 

maki roll: karate kid-

 

kaithoe: WHY ARE WE FUCKING TALKING ABOUT SHOWING HAMSTERS UP OUR ASSES

 

my chemical bromance: why did you even think to talk about this

 

Japantsu: and why would you want to know suckhara, you into it or something

 

kaithoe: just imagine instead of the four dark devas of destruction its the four dark dicks of destruction

 

my chemical bromance: for fucks sake miu

 

kaithoe: like just gundham thinks he’s carrying four hamsters but in realitity its just four little dicks

 

piss kink: fjddbvnNJDFJGSKDBSJDF

 

kinkaede: oh my god

 

rantarotoast: DFNJDDVF OH MY FUCKGV

 

god is real and he sucked my dick: ATUA WOULD BE P R O UD OF THIS CONVERSATION

 

vorekiyo: that certainly is an interesting… thought, you would have to have quite the unique mindset to be tricked into thinking that

 

mthoer: i-

 

my chemical bromance: does that mean he’s just going about showing them off to everyone, like collectibles or trophies

 

rantarotoast: there just mechanical dildos that move

 

rantarotoast: probably made by miu or smth

 

piss kink: they’re fuzzy and have googly eyes glued on

 

kinkaede: im remembering the time I overheard peko and hajime talking about going to see gundham so peko could pet one of his animals

 

kinkaede: she just goes there and gundham is talking to a fuzzy, mechanical dick.

 

kinkaede: she just leaves without saying about word

 

kinkaede: “goddamit hajime”

 

piss kink: FUCKFDNGVFJDBDG D OH MY GOD

 

my chemical bromance: oh m fucking god

 

cuckichi: >:O SHUICHI LANGUAGE

 

kaithoe: ??holy shit shuuichi shore

 

maki roll: shore

 

kaithoe: babe :(((

 

maki roll: one time shuuichi stubbed his toe and swore loud enough a teacher came to investigate

 

My chemical bromance: wow maki and here I though you where my friend

 

my chemical bromance: did all the times we regretted our friendship in kaito all for naught

 

vorekiyo: I’m finding this conversation quite exciting~ I’m learning so much new information~

 

harry potter ripoff: its the oppisite of you then

 

harry potter ripoff: because you’re

 

happy potter ripoff: pretty _voring_

 

_*_ _several people are typing*_

 

happy potter ripoff: it’s been like five minuets and like seven of u have been typing you’re’all scaring mne

 

rantarotoast: korekiyo flung his phone at the wall

 

rantarotoast: did u just sfuckign say you’re’all

 

mthoer: that is the worst use of grammar I’ve seen

 

mthoer: and kokichi is in this chat

 

piss kink: im in this chat 2 u kno owo

 

mthoer: tsumugi too

 

mthoer: fucking furry

 

mthoer: I should’ve disowned you eons ago

 

piss kink: why are you so mean to me :((

 

my chemical bromance: you’re a furry tsumugi

 

rantarotoast: you sound like dumbledoor

 

my chemical bromance: w h a t

 

rantarotoast: *shuuchi imitating an old man voice* y o u ‘ r e a f u r r y t s u m u g i

 

cuckichi: kokichigod

 

kinkaede: @piss kink don’t you have a scar on your forehead

 

piss kink: y e a hhh

 

my chemical bromance: oh my god

 

my chemical bromance: o h m y g o d

 

mthoer: Can all of you please just go to sleep. I’m concerned.

 

Mthoer: If I see anyone type anything other than a goodnight message I will kick you out of this chat.

 

My chemical bromance: goodnight!!

 

_my chemical bromance has went offline_

 

_kinkaede and two others have went offline_

 

Makiroll: end my suffering

 

bugslife: goodnight!! gonta hopes everyone has sweet dreams!!

 

_Mthoer has removed Makiroll from the groupchat._

 

_Mthoer and four others have went offline._

 

Japantsu: the police is gone, quick everyone yell penis

 

cuckichi: PENIS

 

Japantsu: PENIS

 

piss kink: P 3 N 1 5

 

Japantsu: GIVE ME A P

piss kink: P

 

Japantsu: GIVE ME AN E

 

cuckichi: E

 

piss kink: E

 

Japantsu: GIVE ME AN N

 

piss kink: N

 

cuckichi: M

 

cuckichi: FUCK

 

Japantsu: GIVE ME AN I

 

piss kink: haha

 

cuckichi: I

 

piss kink: I

 

Japantsu: GIVE ME AN S

 

piss kink: S

 

cuckichi: S

 

Japantsu: WHAT DOES THAT SPELL?

 

piss kink: PENIS

 

cuckichi: PENIS

 

Japantsu: GOTTA GET THAT DICK GOTTA GET THAT KINGS JEWELS WHAT DO I MEAN? PENIS

 

cuckichi: WHAT'S STANNDING TO ATTENTION? PENIS

 

piss kink: miu what have you started

 

Japantsu: something beautiful

 

piss kink: this is gods work

 

_mthoer has come online_

 

Japantsu: PENIS

 

piss kink: YO WHATS THE SCOOP?

 

cuckichi: NJEFSDGBNVRNRBG F

 

cuckichi: PENIS

 

mthoer: s t o p

 

piss kink: wh yam i laughing so hard tbis is the worst conversation

 

mthoer: please, all of you go to sleep before force you too.

 

piss kink: ur not my mum >:(

 

mthoer: my nickname says otherwise

 

mthoer: go to sleep or i’ll kick all of you.

 

piss kink: finnneeeeeeeeee

 

cuckichi: night mommy!!

 

Japantsu: NIGHT DADDY

 

_Japantsu has went offline_

 

_piss kink has went offline_

 

_cuckichi has went offline_

 

mthoer: _finally_

 

_mthoer has went offline_

 

rantarotoast: ….

 

rantarotoast: penis

 

* * *

 

mthoer: for fucks sake

 

* * *

 

Japantsu: did you guys know that emo stands for eat me out

 

Japantsu: @my chemical bromance

 

rantarotoast: OH MY GOOOOODDD

 

my chemical bromance: …

 

_my chemical bromance has changed his nickname to one deduction_

 

piss kink: shuuichi im disowning you as a friend

 

one deduction: good.

 

* * *

 

 

cuckichi: EVERYOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOONNNNNNNNNNNNE LISTEN UP I HAVE A BIG ANNOUNCEMENT

 

Les-BIEN: no one cares you degenerate

 

kinkaede: OOOO IS THIS WHAT I THINK IT IS

 

my chemical bromance: yeah

 

kinkaede: >:DDD

 

bugs life: what is kokichi’s announcement?

 

piss kink: OWO

 

chuckichi: vape monkey can you give me a drum roll

 

piss kink: ofc

 

mthoer: Please be quick with this kokichi, I have a lot of work to do.

 

cuckichi: is everyone here???

 

Makiroll: unfortunately.

 

kaithoe: how come tsumugi, kaede and shu already know??

 

piss kink: because i’m a better friend

 

Japantsu: how could someone with tits so baggy like you be a better friend??

 

kinkaede: SSHHHH

 

piss kink: *dramatic drum roll*

 

cuckichi: I am proudddd to announceeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeee

 

cuckichi: that shuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuichiiiiii

 

kaithoe: ??

 

cuckichi: has official

 

rantarotoast: kokichi smooching rights???

 

cuckichi: kokichi smooching rights!!

 

cuckichi: >:O cadoman how did you know

 

rantarotoast: someone mentioned I earlier lmao

 

Harry potter ripoff: did.. you just… use…. Lmao

 

kaithoe: what do you mean by kokichi smooching rihgts??

 

one deduction: well uhhh..

 

one deduction: he’s kinda my boy friend now??

 

kaithoe: w a I t w h a t

 

kaithoe: WAIT WWHAT

 

kaithoe: AND YOU DIDNT TELL ME??????

 

kaithoe: YOUR MEANT TO BE MY BRO,,, BRO

 

one deduction: IM SORRY BRO

 

kaithoe: BRO I THOUGHT WE HAD SOMETHING SPECIAL

 

one deduction: BRO I WAS GOIN TO TELL YOU BUT KOKICHI KEPT SAYING THAT HE DDNT WANT YOU TO KNOW TILL EVEYRONE EELSE DID

 

kaithoe: OH OK BRO IT’S FINE

 

one deduction: THANKS BRO,,

 

kaithoe: BRO

 

one deduction: BRO,,,

 

kaithoe: BR O

 

rantarotoast: what language are they speaking

 

kinkaede: there speaking bro

 

cuckichi: brussian

 

piss kink: BRUSSAIN

 

mthoer: I am happy for you both.

 

Les-BIEN: tenko is fine with this

 

kinkaede: you are?????

 

Les-BIEN: yes! Now there is two less degenerates to go after the girls!!

 

piss kink: of course

 

bugs life: Gonta is very happy for Shuuichi!! Gonta hopes he enjoys “kokichi smooching rights”

 

one deduction: thhanbbk yoeu gonntda;;,,,,

 

kaithoe: are you crytpying

 

piss kink: who wouldn’t cry type over gonta

 

kaithoe: maki roll

 

kaithoe: speaking of maki roll where is she???

 

mthoer: I removed her from the chat

 

piss kink: why????

 

mthoer: I said if anyone talked after I said go to sleep I would kick them, she spoke, so I removed her.

 

kaithoe: can you add her back???

 

 

_piss kink added Maki Harukawa to the chat_

 

_piss kink changed Maki Harukawa’s nickname to Maki roll_

 

piss kink: there u go!!

 

kaithoe: thank you!! :D!!

 

* * *

 

 

kaithoe: u know

 

kaithoe: I wanna be like buzz mcfucking lightyear

 

kaithoe: big muscles

 

kaithoe: big titties

 

kaithoe: and an even bigger heart

 

I believe: what

 

rantarotoast: what

 

cuckichi: what

 

one deduction: w ha t


	2. In which, Miu vores.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> vore

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> uhh i started writing this chapter right after i posted the first and i was working on it when it was best boy (ryoma's) birthday. this fic is only to destress and not a serious thing so i really dont care about inconsistencies or mistakes. this chapter is really short compared to the last one but if i tried to make it as long as it, it would've taken an extra month or two because i write these only when im really stressed or have a good idea, but hopefully next chapter shouldn't take so long because i have a good 9 conversations planned for it.
> 
> also ty for over 100 kudos and almost 1000 hits!!

OWO is the meaning of life

 

11.34am

 

one deduction: @cuckichi where are youuuuuuu

 

kaithoe: I can’t believe you’re a clingy boyfriend

 

kinkaede: I mean

 

kinkaede: he’s super cuddly and affectionate

 

cuckichi: Kaede stop trying to steal my boyfriend

 

cuckichi: he’s mine and I luv him

 

kinkaede: this was before you both start dating, we where both lonely so we decided to just snuggle and watch movies

 

kinkaede: I miss it already :(

 

one deduction: Now you can snuggle with you know who instead ;)

 

kinkaede: SHU

 

kaithoe: you know who??

 

piss kink: :O kaede has a cruuuuuuuush

 

cuckichi: and I’m going to go establish my secret organisation with my comrades in preparation to take over the world

 

one deduction: So you’re going home for lunch?

 

cuckichi: yeah

 

one deduction: Can I join you??

 

cuckichi: y e s

 

one deduction: Ok!!! let me finish up and i’ll meet you at the vending machines

 

japantsu: what are you having for lunch cock-ichi?

 

Japantsu: shuuichi’s ass?

 

Piss kink: vore

 

one deduction: M I U

 

rantarotoast: it’s a valid question

 

piss kink: if you want to eat shuuichi’s ass. You. Are. Valid.

 

kinkaede: fjdbdgsjnkdn

 

one deduction: Why haven’t I left this chat yet

 

maki roll: Because it’s impossible

 

maki roll: No _matter how much you leave, how much to try to run and hide from this hellhole, you’ll always find you_ _r_ _self back. You try, time and time again, but every_ _-_ _time you are added back, the nicknames cuckichi, piss kink and japtansu seem to taunt you, laugh in your face, but every. Single. Fucking. Time. You accept it. You accept you’ll be stuck seeing terrible sex jokes, weeb shit, and nishishi until the day you die, or the day you finally fucking snap and choke_ _K_ _okichi_ _and Miu_ _to fucking death._

 

one deduction: Jesus fuck maki are you okay, I’m honestly really fuckign concerned for you right now

 

japantsu: am I really that bad

 

rantarotoast: yes

 

maki roll: I am perfectly fine. I just have a lot of pent up anger directed to mostly everyone in our class.

 

kinkaede: mostly everyone?

 

Maki roll: At this point the only people I can tolerate is Kirumi, Shuuichi, Kaede and Ryoma. Kaito and Gonta are on thin fucking ice.

 

One deduction: I slightly get Kaito but why is Gonta there?

 

cuckichi: im so torn between being scared for my life and saying choke me harder maki

 

maki roll: He accidentally let termites into my room. Which is mostly wooden furniture, that and it annoys me how easily manipulated he is by Kokichi.

 

kinkaede: you should probably be scared

 

japantsu: yeah

 

japantsu: leave the choking to poo-ichi

 

one deduction:

 

one deduction: You know what nvm maki that’s a fuckign mood

 

cuckichi: ooo~ shumai? Are you into that by any chance?

 

One deduction: hey kaede where are you I have suddenly changed my mind about what I want to do for lunch

 

rantarotoast: thats cold

 

japantsu: also on the subject of vore…

 

cuckichi: vore is like the more sexy, dignified cousin of cannibalism

 

kinkaede: how is vore in any shape sexy or dignified

 

japantsu: don't knock it until you’ve tried it

 

rantarotoast: wai twhat

 

one deduction: wha tht eufkc

 

kinkaede: miu are 6ou fguiging impyling you’ve vored

 

I believe: I want to die

 

piss kink: me too holy shit

 

maki roll: I take back what I said earlier goodbye I am done with this fuckign chat

 

_maki roll has left the chat_

 

japantsu: no but I want too

 

piss kink: DCVJFNVFNVN

 

Les-BIEN: i-

 

rantarotoast: THATS PIBO SDVKGFD FOR FUCKS SAKE

 

kinkaede: JESUS FUCK MIU

 

kinkaede: I KNOW YOU HAVE KINKS BUT WHY

 

kinkaede: THIS IS FAR EVER FOR YOU

 

cuckichi: ANVFDGNJB

 

cuckichi: VROE I VALID

 

one deduction: IT IS NO T

 

japantsu: VORE

 

japantsu: VORE

 

japantsu: VORE

 

japantsu: VORE

 

japantsu: VORE

 

harry potter ripoff:

 

 

Les-BIEN: Himiko I love you but what the fuck

 

rantarotoast: mood

 

japantsu: VORE

 

japantsu: VORE

 

_I believe has removed japantsu from the chat_

 

one deduction: The evil has been defeated

 

one deduction: Please for the sake of everyone’s mental health don't add her back

 

_cuckichi has added Miu Iruma to the chat_

 

one deduction: KOKICHI

 

_Miu Iruma has changed her nickname to kirby likes vore_

 

piss kink: chiaki would be so pissed at you

 

rantarotoast: im pretty sure chiaki has read mario porn why would she be pissed

 

rantarotoast: she’d encourage it

 

kinkaede: chiaki what the fuck

 

I believe: nevermind whoeverthefuckthatis im still pissed at miu

 

_kaithoe has added Maki Harukawa to the chat_

 

_kaithoe has changed Maki Harukawa’s nickname to maki roll_

 

kaitohoe: how do you not know who chiaki is

 

maki roll: Let me die

 

I believe: I am a cryptid.

 

I believe: Mood.

 

one deduction: She’s in third year, she usually hangs around Hajime and he who must not be named

 

kaithoe: no

 

piss kink: KNADKFSJKGNLJF

 

god is real and he sucked my dick: Who is he must not be named?

 

harry potter ripoff: wait 

 

harry potter ripoff: is it him

 

kinkaede: is nagito voldemort???

 

cuckichi: HE WAS NAMED 

 

piss kink: KAEDE YOU’VE CURSED US ALL

 

bugs life: Who is Nagito?

 

maki roll: God I wish that was me

 

kirby likes vore: he’s rantaro’s long lost brother

 

rantarotoast: wait what the fuck

 

kaitohoe: WHY RANTARO???

 

I believe: Wait what.

 

cuckichi: RANTARO ULTIMATE BASTARD 2.0

 

one deduction: JFDGNNBJGKFNJ

 

piss kink: NAKSGJFNGN

 

bugs life: Rantaro is Nagito’s brother??

 

rantarotoast: NO I’M NOT MIU WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU GOING ON ABOUT

 

kirby likes vore: I have an inside source

 

kinkaede: who??

 

kirby likes vore: me n kazuicthy n cheerio where hangin out and we started talkiing about u guys for some reason

 

kirby likes vore: with ur bullshit luck powers

 

piss kink: what luck powers

 

kirby likes vore: I once asked rantarhoe to get me a drink and the machine broke and it dispensed all of the drinks at once, apparently the same thing happened with nagito

 

cuckichi: rantaro is nagito kin 

 

one deduction: KNADFSKJDKNKJG;RLJLJN

 

kinkaede: DFNFJSNJFNBNGN 

 

piss kink: KJADSKJDFKJJBFJB

 

kinkaede: GUESS WHAT

kinkaede: IT’S A NATIONAL HOLIDAY

mthoer: What?

kinkaede: IT’S RYOMA’S BIRTHDAY

cuckichi: happy birthday to the sexiest man in our class

Les-BIEN: what the fuck

piss kink: ryoma is like the unsexiest being in this school no offense

I believe: Why would I take offense to that.

kirby likes vore: are you trying to imply you wouldn’t fuck the midget?

 

midget fucker: I approve of this nickname

 

kinkaede: Are you trying to imply you would??

 

midget fucker: what else would I be implying cow tits

 

kaitohoe: it’s miu she’d fuck anything

 

rantarotoast: I mean i’d fuck the midget

 

I believe: Rantaro. Why.

 

mthoer: Can we please stop discussing wither or not we would fuck Ryoma.

 

I believe: p l e a se

 

I believe: I don't want to know who would fuck me.

 

midget fucker: if you’d fuck ryoma say balls

 

midget fucker: balls

 

rantarotoast: balls

 

kinkaede: n o

 

Les-BIEN: i’d rather die

 

cuckichi: balls

 

kaitohoe: aren’t you dating shuichi dude

 

one deduction: balls

 

kaithoe: wha the fuck shuichi

 

one deduction: nishishishi

 

one deduction: WAIT FUCK

 

kinkaede: kokichi did you steal shuichi’s phone

 

cuckichi: no whatever do you mean

 

vorekiyo: i’d rather not

 

midget fucker: smh y’all are pussies

 

I believe: c a n w e s t o p di s c u s s I n g w h o w o u ld f cukc me pl e a s e

 

mthoer: I think Ryoma Is going to start crying if we continue.

 

Piss kink: for a second I thought ryoma wrote kanye west

 

midget fucker: kanye west likes fingers in his ass

 

cuckichi: ryoma, ultimate kanye west fan

 

I belive: Jokes on you i’m already crying

 

one deduction: I go to get a drink and come back to this

 

one deduction: I know im not ryoma but i’m crying too

 

maki roll: you’re always crying

 

bugs life: balls

 

kinkaede: what the fukf iggn ??? GONTA??? WAHT??

 

piss kink: FUCGJRNNBGNWRFNDSFDJJ IH MUCBV

 

rantarotoast: DCFLDKGNKGKFN

 

rantarotoast: tbf

 

mthoer: Tbf?

 

rantarotoast: to be fair

 

rantarotoast: gonta’s dick is probably bigger than ryoma’s body

 

Les-BIEN: what the actual fuck

 

bugs life: Kokichi told gonta to say it!!

 

maki roll: Gonta please just stop talking to Kokichi already

 

kaithoe: I think gonta’s dick would actually kill ryoma

 

I believe: I know I say I want to die a lot but not like that

 

kaithoe: he just dicks him in two

 

kinkaede: cnaa we stop discusing gth is fo r rfucks SAKE

 

maki roll: I swear to god if we do not stop talking about gonta/ryoma and the word fuck I will skin someone alive

 

maki roll: And that person will be either miu or kokichi

 

one deduction: why them

 

maki roll: It’s their fault. it’s always their fault.

 

* * *

 

 

3.17am

 

cuckichi: I know it’s 3am but I was eating a toffee and shuichi turned to me and said I was peeling off the toffee’s skin

 

cuckichi: I don't want to eat the toffee anymore

 

cuckichi: he’s judging me

 

cuckichi: “you either eat it with the skin or you don’t eat it at all”

 

kinkaede: shuichi what the fuck

 

kaithoe: oh yeah he does that some times

 

piss kink: w h a t

 

kaithoe: he just sometimes start spouting really crytic stuff

 

kaithoe: one time he just started saying stuff like “what happens if we're all in a simulation. we're like guinea pigs or cats. or frogs on top of cats under frogs”, "a penguin looks like an oreo", "ARE PISSFICS REALLY BAD?? yeah they're bad”, "are pissfics meant to be sexualized. or are sexalities meant to be pissfics" , “we are our parents ocs”

 

kaithoe: im honestly kinda concerned for him

 

I believe: why am I the class cryptid then

 

harry potter ripoff: I… thought…. Vorekiyo was… our… class.. cryptid

 

maki roll: why do you type like that himiko

 

harry potter ripoff: why… not

 

* * *

 

 

_Private chat between Shuichi Saihara and Kaito Momota_

 

Let’s go and take a trip in our favourite rocket dick

 

22:57pm

 

Buzz lightyear kin: Hey uh

 

Buzz lightyear kin: Shuichi???

 

Buzz lightyear kin: I really need you’re advice on something

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have a lot of ideas for the next chapter which is gonna have a lot of amaguji n kokichi bc me and my friend where hanging out and we where talking about dumb shit.
> 
> but hey, im working on two pic multichapter fics, ones a angsty sdr2 fic and the other is a oumasai fic, so uh look forward to them I guess bc their my first proper multichapter fics. 
> 
> The sdr2 one is heavily planned and has a lot of details while the oumasai one is me kinda winging it with the vaguest plot idea

**Author's Note:**

> i dont know what im doign


End file.
